How have I gotten to this point? Kicking and screaming, I must confess. You see, every struggle is an opportunity to
die to self, which is a necessary prerequisite to growth. It is one of life’s many ironies that life
requires death, but then life in Christ means accepting the greatest ironies of
all time—that an ugly instrument of death, the cross, brings abundant
life.
Christ makes this truth perfectly clear in John
12:24–25, “I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground
and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many
seeds.” Before a plant can grow,
the seed gives its life, breaking apart to bring forth life. Our self must die, that is we must give up
our self-will, before God can bring forth life.
What makes a struggle a struggle is
that our will is desperately pulling in one direction in opposition to what God
wants. If it weren’t, then it wouldn’t
be called a struggle. The more we try to
assert self will, the more struggle there is.
Which is not to say that even if we totally surrender, there isn’t
pain. No, one of the most basic of all
truths is that dying hurts.
Sometimes that growth takes a long
time. It is at this time that we must
trust that God is faithful to our sacrifices and growth will happen in his due
time. Scientists have found long dormant
seeds that are capable of growth if given the right environment, some as old as
10,000 years.* Those favorable
conditions, of course, are abiding in Christ’s love (the sun) and the Word
(water). Then in his timing (Ah, there
is the rub) growth will happen.
It is very difficult, however, to wait
on the Lord. But his timing is not
ours. He has all of eternity as his
battlefield. (I know I am mixing
metaphors here). Whereas we would go for
the quickest route to victory, God knows that quick doesn’t always bring
success. It may gain us some ground in
the short run, but doesn’t always bring victory in the end. Victory involves our maturity into people
that resemble Jesus Christ and this takes time. And make no mistake; it is only through God
that victory is achieved. Psalm 44:3
says:
It was not by their sword that they won
the land,
nor did their arm bring them victory;
it was your right hand, your arm,
and the light of your face, for you loved them.
nor did their arm bring them victory;
it was your right hand, your arm,
and the light of your face, for you loved them.
What is our reward for victory (besides
growth into maturity)? Besides the peace
and comfort that comes from the father throughout the struggle, which I have
written of at great length, there is the victory we will experience in heaven
when he says to us “Good and faithful servant” (Matt 25:21) and we get our
jewels in our crowns. (Ps 149:4).
We will also experience rest. Mathew 11: 28 says: 28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will
give you rest. 29 Take
my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and
you will find rest for your souls. 30 For
my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
The yoke here is the Cross (Luke 9:23).
The cross is where Christ denied his will for the sake of the Father’s
will unto death. We too are asked to
deny ourselves and take up our cross.
That cross is different for everybody, but ultimately it is the point
where our will clashes the most with God’s will for our lives. Mine happens to be Cancer. I have had my own garden of Gethsemane where
I prayed for this cup to be taken from me. Still, I know it will also be my
greatest source of victory! When you
come to this realization it is such a place of freedom and joy that you get to
experience victory even in the midst of your struggle. This is truly blooming where you are planted!
So every struggle, no matter how small or large, is on
opportunity to die to self. We should
ask, “What is God’s will in this?” and
“What do I need to learn from this?” and trust that, in the long run, the Lord
will use every opportunity to bring Good to us.
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God
works for the good of those who love him, who have been
called according to his purpose.
The perfect picture of this is Jesus in
the Garden of Gethsemane. I like the account in Luke because it highlights his
anguish so well:
Luke 22:41-43
41 He withdrew about a stone’s throw beyond them, knelt down
and prayed, 42 “Father,
if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.”
43 An angel from heaven appeared to him and
strengthened him. 44 And being in
anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood
falling to the ground.
Jesus, the perfect Son of God, was in
so much anguish that he sweated blood!
Dying to self doesn’t come naturally and is not without struggle. We must give ourselves some slack if we don’t
at first react with gentle submission.
But there are some things to remember
in this passage. First, an angel from
heaven appeared to him to strengthen him.
In the same way, God will provide us strength to endure the struggle and
to relinquish our will. It is, again,
irony that it takes great strength to give up, but here it is.
Second, the struggle caused Jesus to
pray more earnestly. When we experience
struggle, we must step up the prayers in a fierce way. It is on our knees that we are closest to
the altar. It is on our knees that we
are strongest. Dear friends, join me in
praying:
I am the seed, oh Lord,
In Love, Press me to you
so that I may die,
That in that dance
my shell of a heart may break,
disappear,
to be born again
in the green growing of life in you.
Ephesians 3: 16-19
16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you
with power through his Spirit in your inner being,
17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts
through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,
18 may have power, together with all the
Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of
Christ, 19 and to know this love that
surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness
of God.
*Taylor, Joanne. “Seeds for success, Pt. 2: A seed must die before it grows.” 13 April 2010. Examiner.com.